Caption Gallery

Caption Competition Gallery previous competition classics
...and this is the dork I lost the world open to. Brad	If he doesn't hurry up with that token I'm going home ... Niko
"No Martin, even if you intend to go to Vassar for your studies, you cannot play the WISPA event there!" Maureen	Police find 300 witnesses to unprovoked racket attack. Victim says "I was just having fun" Spence	You might think it's funny now. But when we find out who put the mouse trap in the men's urinals, there will be hell to pay. AJS
No, sorry love, we play squash here. I think the Anne Summers party is next door. Russ Gilder	(The Dolls) "Don't worry guys, Vicky told me size doesn't matter" Mark	Oh God, I think my Air Trainers have sprung a leak ! Marc Falconer
Alan says, “Put Tim back before he wakes up, or he’ll think he’s won the British Open”. Brian Rawlinson	Mark: Precious, where's that tenner you owe me? Precious: I'm a bit short ... Mark Tiernan	New attire has been designed to control ball-temperature during squash matches. Simon Gibson
"For God's sake - I said put in a glass court, not put the whole damn thing in glass - I'm out of here!" Laurie Maclachlan	"hey jimmy ur u luking at ma womin cus jus u waatch it ur al stik ih heid on yi" ... AJS	Where's the on button? Steve R
KEEP STILL... I'll get this racket out of your chest in a sec. Gazza	What do you think Sarah, should I blow my nose or just pick it out? Troy Cross	Hurry up Del, it's killing me holding up this palm tree! Neil Brierley
I think it's stuck up your left nostril ... Peter Panteli	But Alannnnn, I wanted the moneeeeyyyyyyy! Andy JG	Used Karakal grips - the smooth rolling tobacco ... Steve Lodge
So Anthony, any last words before you get the cake in your face? Louise Comb	Doctors have said that there is nothing they can do for these Siamese triplets. Paul Teulon	Not me, mate, focus on the DUNLOP racket, that's D-U-N-L-O-P ... Steve C
I can see my racquet through your ear Carl Gilbert	"So, we need teabags, toilet roll, and milk ..." Steve Evans	'We're not digging the ref up until someone goes and gets the beers...' C Stevens
Just wait till I find the btard who put the superglue on this towel! Mark Ferguson**	Sally makes a terrific get - balls even Barada couldn't get to ... Christy Looby	CW: What's with the baseball cap? Sarah: Bad hair day- you never know when the squashplayer caption competition is lurking around! Christy Looby
"Anthony somehow holds his tongue after already having received a conduct warning for foul language." Mark Rodell	Let please, impaired follow-through! James Newton	" I swear I saw him in the shower - Parke's "personal" racquet is this big" Daniel Bradbury
Jewish squash team perform circumcision on last minute guest 5th string player ... Alan Sinclair	Erm...This wasn't quite what I meant by "let's go bash the bishop"!!! *Lee Beckett*	Listen, Paul, I'll feint to hit it deep, you play a straight drop in the middle, and then we'll both block the bastards coming in from either side Alan Thatcher
You need balls of steel to play this game my friend ... *Asif Riaz*	Too late Peter realises the folly of watching Riverdance the night before a big match ... Don Stewart	I'm telling you it's too cold for a yellow dot ball!!! Malcolm Stainkey
ONE HUNDRED AND EIGHTY... Paul Jordan	"PSA Fishbowl Court #1, you have been cleared for take-off on runway 215..." Mark Bertram	What do you mean I should be on court 8? I've just won 27-0!! Lexi Panteli
Ok - Drop the racquet and come out with your hands in the air!!! Omar Osman	He played a drive to the back corner where he'd farted and his opponent was left gasping! Lexi Panteli	"Left foot blue. Right hand blue. Hold on - are you sure this how you play Twister?" Steve Lodge